Everyone wants to be content. But most of us don’t know how to be content all the time. What causes us to remain unhappy? Is it possible to have constant happiness?
Individuals are unaware that their own actions are what lead to their misery. Being taught that we are in charge of our own happiness offends us. We want to place the blame for our problems elsewhere—always on someone or something else. If there is no apparent cause, we start to blame fate and our stars, hating our lot and destiny.
Various things make different people happy. Some people seek acceptance, while others seek prosperity and notoriety.
You frequently think that obtaining something will make you happier. It may be accepting your proposal from a partner, achieving a challenging goal, or even landing a dream job. You associate happiness with an outcome. You don’t feel happy until you get there. You have, in a sense, chosen to put off experiencing joy. Nevertheless, have you ever noticed that your cravings resurface once you acquire the desired job or feel secure in the new relationship? Now, though, they are aimed at a different object. The only thing that ends a desire is its form.
Despite having a new car, you might not be content. Yet your old car can make someone very happy. Some artists yearn for acceptance and are heartbroken when they aren’t. When someone requests their autograph or a selfie, they are overjoyed. Some who are artists don’t have the same itch. They relish remaining anonymous.
Our mindset determines whether we are happy or dissatisfied, not the automobile or the accolades. But, we put ourselves in danger when we impose these requirements for happiness.
A Persian named Ali Hafed had gardens, orchards, and grain fields in the Deccan. He once heard from a visitor how rich he would be if he had a diamond mine. One evening, Ali Hafed longed for a diamond mine before going to sleep. He soon sold his property and set out to look for diamonds, becoming so destitute and defeated that he ultimately committed suicide. One day, the man who bought Ali Hafed’s land noticed a flash of light in Hafed’s garden stream. He revealed a magnificent diamond. The exquisite Golconda mines were found by the man directly on Hafed’s property.
The secret to enduring happiness is contentment. Even when they have all they require, some people can never be happy.
What is this training that we need, so that we can remain happy all the time?
There are some basic truths that we need to realise about ourselves. The first and most important truth is that happiness is a choice, and we are the architects of our happiness and unhappiness. We are the ones who decide whether we want to live a happy or an unhappy life.
We need to unlearn the habit of remaining unhappy. Happiness is the process of unlearning all that pulls us into a state of wallowing in misery and remaining stressed. Funnily, some of us actually enjoy remaining high-strung and miserable.
